Super. Mario. Live. Wallpapers

Posted by OCEntertainment | Posted on 10:21 AM

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I'm not even going to make fun of this. This is just too amazing.

Some things are sacred.

Action starts around 0:40. You can download the package here.

YouTube Adds Vuvuzela Fea-BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Posted by OCEntertainment | Posted on 7:46 PM

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Dear Fox: Stay Out Of My Gadgets

Posted by OCEntertainment | Posted in , , | Posted on 12:01 PM

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I don't know much about politics. In fact, I think after the last year or so I know far more about politics than I ever cared to. Call it social pressure or just becoming an adult, but suddenly things like foreign policy and economy aren't just empty words. They're empty words rambled about by empty heads. But you know what? Maybe I'm just not educated. So I'll stick to doing what I normally do. Calling out liars for being liars, even if I don't know what the truth is.


And that's always been my position with Fox. The level of intentional idiocy, misdirection, or misunderstanding spouted as wisdom at this network has always astounded me.

But OC, you cry, if you don't know anything about politics or business, how can you say they're wrong? To which I'd reply, a.) I hadn't told you I don't know much about business, where did you hear that? And 2.) I never said I know they're wrong. I said I know they're liars. There's a difference. A liar can tell you the truth in such a way that you walk away misinformed. An honest person can be wrong, and you'll still come out of that conversation wiser. Of course, I can only ever really tell that folks at Fox are liars by inclinations. Instinct. They use suggestive cues to lead you down a pre-defined mental path. I don't know, concerning the subject matter, how they're wrong, except that they act like a sleazy car salesman, or the player I knew in high school who sweet-talked girls into having sex with him, then left them when they were at their most emotionally vulnerable, several hundred miles from home, with no family, about to be homeless.

*ahem*

......But then, every once in a while, I get a gem like this where Fox decided to venture into my territory. Technology. Cell phones, computers, the internet. And almost without fail, any time they mention tech, there's something seriously wrong with their reporting. Today's venture? iPhone vs. Android. As an unashamed fan of Android (though I can be fair when the iPhone deserves credit), I was outright dismayed that Fox was covering this "battle" I'd been following since before the G1 came out.

To start with, the claim that "Disappointingly, the new iPhone (due June 24) doesn't use faster 4G service". Listen, I now own an Evo, and I can tell you, yeah, it's great having the option. But if you were actually expecting 4G service on an iPhone this year, you are out of the loop. AT&T's LTE network is not prepared for a 4G phone until at least 2011 (same as Verizon). Sprint is currently the only one with a 4G (abeit, WiMax) network ready, and will be at least until the end of the year.

Then there's this: "Even Jobs faced service problems during his presentation on Monday."

It would take nothing more than having seen the keynote or reading any article about it to know that the iPhone demos were not being done over AT&T's network, but rather a WiFi signal. You're heavily implying that AT&T was the cause of the data disruption (given that this sentence comes right after you describe AT&T's network as "beleaguered"). Now, I love a good AT&T jab as much as the next non-AT&T user, but come on. Where it's due, please.

But then, the worst of it all.....you mentioned the Garmin phone. The Garmin phone as one of the hot new Android handsets. And why? "It combines the best of a standalone navigation device with the best of a smart phone."

*sigh*

You are officially unqualified to comment on smartphone issues. You cannot possible pit the Garminfone against the iPhone 4 and expect to not get laughed off your blog. Especially when you're touting it's navigation powers, when any Android handset comes with built-in turn-by-turn navigation for free. Admittedly, the Garminfone has offline-maps in its favor, but it's not worth going back to Android 1.6. You know what Android 1.6 is, don't you? No? Oh that's right, you just started paying attention to Android last month.

And the cherry on top?

"It's also anticipated that Verizon will debut a 4G phone within the next few months"

When dealing with Fox, I generally find there's a couple different categories information falls into. Sprinkling of Truth, Misdirecting Half-Truths, and Damn Lies. This is a Damn Lie. Verizon has specifically stated they will not have a 4G phone at least until 2011. As I stated earlier, neither Verizon nor AT&T has the LTE network ready for a 4G phone. And when they do, we gadget nerds will know about it long before you do. Unless you define "the next few months" as "next year", you are simply flat out wrong.

So please. Stop trying to report the gadget news. You really suck at it. And I'm getting tired of having to correct you every time I talk to my friends who end up reading your drivel.

Proof the iPad is Magical

Posted by OCEntertainment | Posted in , , , | Posted on 4:59 PM

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A hint for all you up-and-coming ladies-men out there: If you require a mass-manufactured device to get a girl's attention, you are already doing it wrong from the start.


A tip for all the ladies: If the most interesting thing about a guy is his iPad, raise your standards.

The New Face of the Modern Gamer

Posted by OCEntertainment | Posted in , , | Posted on 12:14 AM

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According to CTA this is it. Nevermind the crappy Photoshop job. And nevermind the mildly attractive/intimidating model CTA used to demo the Wii Weighted Gloves. And yes, she is intimidating. But not because she's physically fit or apparently enjoys a good boxing match. But rather because she has the cojones to be photographed wearing the gloves. A fashion statement that simultaneously says "I am a person who enjoys being physically active" and "I am allergic to sunlight."


Then there's the Wings for Wii. An accessory that you can attach to your arms while playing games like Bird's Eye Bull's Eye, for the Wii Fit. A game that requires you to flap your arms to maintain lift while you, a man in a chicken suit, flies from one precarious inexplicable ledge in the middle of an ocean to another.

In their defense, adding wings would increase your drag, making it more difficult to flap, and thus giving you an ever-so-slightly better work out than without the wings. On the other hand, you look retarded.

But if you look at this woman and think "Man, I hope I can be that cool when I grow up," then may I interest you in the Wii Rowing Machine, the Wii Football Controller, the Wii Bowling Ball, or the Wii Therapist.

*Note: Wii sports are not an acceptable substitute for physical activity, Dr. Phil is not an acceptable substitute for real counseling.

Pixel Zombies: I Take Back Everything I Said, Stick With the iPhone

Posted by OCEntertainment | Posted in , , | Posted on 6:02 PM

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Oh, what's that? You're surprised? After all my Android talk. After positively drooling over the Evo, why would I tell you to stick with the iPhone? One word: Zombies.


I thought that Android's open market was a welcome reprieve from Apple's walled garden of the App Store. With no rules on content and minimal technical restrictions, it ought to be a utopia of innovation, right? Wrong. What you're seeing to your left is a screen grab of a live wallpaper (introduced in Android 2.1, currently available for most major Android handsets) demonstrating a zombie invasion. Red dots represent zombies, green dots represent civilians, and blue dots represent zombie hunters. Madness!

I've learned my lesson. I thought that I wanted openness. But now, my home screen has become invaded by starving-mad meat sacks feasting on the flesh of mortals. Now I have to fear that handing my phone to a friend or family member may get them bit and turn them into a seething, bleeding, ravenous monster.

Now I hear what you're saying at this point. "Well, gee golly gosh, Mr. Disdain. That sure sounds like an awful lot of trouble to get into. I sure don't wanna go gettin' Ma or Pop bit with my telephone device." To which I will respond with a.) what the heck is Theodore Cleaver doing shopping for a smartphone? But more importantly: I'm just getting started.

If you drop an icon on to your home screen, this acts as a nuclear bomb. That's right. A nuclear bomb. Governments all over the world are attempting to limit the use of such weapons of terrifying power, and Google, per their custom, wants to give that kind of power to the average user. For free*. No sir. Not me. I do not accept the responsibility!

Unfortunately, I've already pre-ordered my Evo, so I have no choice but to receive my 2.1 Android device that contains a security hole so big, you could drive a zombie invasion through it.

*-- Well, technically, the wallpaper is $1 in the Market. And technically Google didn't make the zombie app. Though supporting the nuclear weapons API in the OS was a hugely irresponsible move on their part so they are just as much to blame.

On Piracy and Theft

Posted by OCEntertainment | Posted in , , , , , | Posted on 1:39 PM

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[Editor's Note: Normally, we don't post stuff this serious. Trifling about with morality and right and wrong? Pshaw. We much prefer to sit back and make fun of people and companies that do silly things, make silly things, say silly things, or are silly things. But Offical-As-Of-Now Guest Writer Odin asked to be reposted. And his article has a picture of a nun with an eye patch. And if you think about it, the old lady with a scarf analogy is kind of funny. I mean imagine her face when some punk runs up and steals her scarf but, WHOAAA! It's still in her hand too! Whahahaha! *ahem* But I digress. Anyways, here's his post, originally published here.]


Lets get this straight. Piracy is not theft and theft is not piracy.

Sure enough the two are related concepts but it's wholly inaccurate to classify one as the other. While in the eyes of the law they are both crimes, piracy is one that average people are more ready to commit. Why is that? Namely it's because they don't see the harm in it. If you steal an old ladies purse then that old lady no longer has her purse. Where is she going to put her knitting now? Reasonable people feel guilt over performing such actions and often go crazy from the clickaty-clack of the knitting needles echoing throughout their conscience.

However, if you were to take an exact copy of her purse then she still has somewhere to put her knitting and you'd have half a scarf. Everybody wins. Except of course now you'll never buy her scarves at the weekly jumble sale and she won't be able to afford that trip to Florida any more. Of course most people don't think that far ahead so they'll live quite happily with their ill-gotten gains free from guilt and those pesky haunting knitting needles.

Theft basically boils down to the removal of value. You take something valuable and someone else no longer has that value. It has been irrecoverably (unless they arrest your thieving ass) removed from the system. With piracy though the original value is never removed. What changes is the potential levels of value. And unlike theft piracy can actually result in a gain of value for the victim of the piracy. This I believe is the biggest factor that differentiates piracy from theft, it can actually have a positive effect on value.

Lets revisit our old friend the old knitting lady for some scarf themed examples of the three potential effects of piracy:

1. Negative potential value

This sadly is likely the most common form of piracy and is generally why it's considered theft as well as an all round bad thing. Take Mr Bastard now. Mr Bastard would normally purchase a scarf from the dear old lady but upon finding out he can receive a magical scarf duplicate ends up not doing so. In this case a potential sale existed but then was lost due to piracy. The old lady has lost potential value. And she is sad.

2. Neutral potential value

Probably the second most common form. Take Mr Apathetic. Mr Apathetic would never consider purchasing a scarf from the dear old lady. However he will take a copied one for free. If he couldn't get it for free though he wouldn't purchase one. Here no potential sale existed in the first place so there is nothing lost, nothing gained. It's still not morally correct but the victim has technically lost nothing. The old lady has lost nothing, gained nothing. She is knitting.

3. Positive potential value

What's this? Positive piracy? Surely not! Piracy is a bad dirty crime for thieving bastards I hear you cry. But consider the case of Mr Unconvinced. Like Mr Apathetic he never considered a scarf purchase. However upon trying a free copy of it he comes to the realisation that he really likes it and pays the old lady her due. Here this is a sale that previously didn't exist in potentia but was created through piracy. The old lady has actually gained value from this. She is off to Florida.

This isn't an endorsement of piracy nor is it showing that it's morally acceptable. It's merely an illustration that it's more complicated than simple theft and how the two actions should be considered independently of each other. It's not such a black and white concept.

Unlike this Jolly Roger I'm knitting.

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