Autistic Disdain

Google released their newest service today. Google Buzz. It's purpose is to provide a semi-public, semi-private feed of real-time information from your friends or just people around you. And it is going to change the friggin' world

For starters, let's get the obvious comparison out of the way. Google Wave. Obviously, folks will try to measure Buzz against Wave because it is also a service Google came out with. So clearly they are the same. Google Wave offers real-time document collaboration by multiple users. Google Buzz offers real-time feeds of short bits publicly or privately published by multiple users. See? "Real-time", "multiple users"? The similarities are uncanny! But don't worry. Google Buzz still manages to be revolutionary in its own right.

Google Buzz includes a host of other features that Wave doesn't. Like Twitter replies, followers, and micro-blogging! Yep. With Google Buzz you can now satisfy that completely never-ever-before-scratched itch to share your thoughts about whatever to a group of whoever from wherever. It's everything! It's nothing! It's hip! It's awesome!

But it's totally not Facebook. Don't you dare call it that. Shut. Up. Ok? Buzz is not Facebook. Buzz may organize your friends with Google Contacts. Or host your photos with Picasa. Or your videos with YouTube. And you may have status messages. And profiles. But it is not Facebook, ok?! Because, see, Buzz has geo-tagging (in the mobile version). So, if you update your status with a GPS-enabled phone or computer, it can include your location in your Buzz status. Which makes it easier to find you. See, whereas Facebook is for stalking people's social lives by spying on their profiles, researching their friends, and making passive aggressive statuses, Buzz is for spying on people's profiles, researching their friends, making passive aggressive statuses AND actually stalking people! Google Buzz can be creepier than Facebook could ever hope to be! Haha!

So, seriously. Join the Wave Buzz. Start tweeting buzzing. And reconnect with all your friends on Google Buzz.

Currently rolling out to all Gmail users.